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Jim's Jottings


Doctor, do I watch too many detective shows?



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February 29, 2012 - My most watched shows on television are "The Mentalist," "NCIS," "The Closer" and "Blue Blood." My DVR is programmed to record them.

They came to mind recently when I found myself searching for the background of a recently recommended orthopedic surgeon.

Last October I first noticed my left forearm hurt when it touched the arm of my computer chair. At first I ignored it, then in January I mentioned it to my GP.

Neither he nor I could locate the sore spot by feeling the arm. Then came the testing, mostly at Crittenton Hospital.

That was an x-ray. Over the next month inconclusive findings came from a catscan, an MRI and a CT, whatever that is.

Ah, my doctor said, let's see if an orthopedic person can conclude something from these four tests.

This one was officed at Beaumont Hospital's Campus-home in Royal Oak. Calling that complex a campus doesn't begin to describing the size of this layout.

Our instructions were to follow the green signs. The only less-than 4-story building is what looks to be a sprawling rich man's home. There are acres of parking lots, plus a 4-story parking structure.

There's money in medicine, baby!

My first background check of my latest doctor was the phone book. Her name sounded oriental, but when I asked if she was Chinese, I got a giggle.

It was my plan to make sure I was given results in non-broken English.

Her phone number-address indicated a Clarkston area residence. That clue got me to thinking she must know of, and should be reading one of Sherman Publications four weekly newspapers, The Clarkston News.

With that knowledge I could start a conversation, setting a friendly atmosphere, and maybe getting her to inform me totally of my sore.

Tom Sellack on Blue Blood couldn't have done it better.

I started, "You must read The Clarkston News?"

"I leaf through it.".

"Do you read Page 7?"

"What's on Page 7?"

That's when my driver, son Jim, said, "That's where his column is."

Now, I reasoned, I was not just a patient, but someone she should want to know.

There was more banter, with it ending when she promised, "I will certainly read your column on Page 7 of The Clarkston News that's home on my counter."

Playing the part of the Mentalist, I continued to study her eyes as she said, "I found nothing to be concerned about in your pictures."

Ah, great news is always wonderful to hear and see telepathically .

- - - 0 - - -

• A ESPN announcer said, "Stay tuned for Women's Cup standings." I stayed tuned hoping they would also announce the Men's Cup standings.

• A pizza company is running a campaign to stop avian obesity. Someone, please, come up with a dietary bird seed.

• When a pill company spends more time warning of possible effects than selling the product, hit the ignore button.

• If the amount of our national debt is not important, as Obama says, why pay taxes?

Jim Sherman, Sr. is president of Sherman Publications, Inc. He has penned "Jim's Jottings" since 1955.
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