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Opinions
Phil in the Blank
A column by Phil Custodio
Predictions for 2010
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December 30, 2009 - With the new decade upon us (or close enough at least), how about some predictions:
• Frustrated by a lack of progress on important Independence Township matters, Trustee Neil Wallace calls for bi-daily meetings of the Township Board. Meetings still go on past 1 a.m.
• Realizing limiting information to a community including many of its own graduates insults everyone's intelligence, Clarkston Community Schools decides to post its entire financial record on the internet and launches a district-wide "Everyone shares their ideas with everyone else" campaign.
• After having repaid their debt to society, the downtown Clarkston graffitists return to help finish the 5 South Main St. mural, this time putting clothes on their art figures. Artist Michelle Tynan is thrilled with their work.
• Hearing this year's Fourth of July fireworks display planned for Clintonwood Park consists of one guy holding a sparkler, due to budget cuts, residents organize a road trip to Tennessee to get some decent aerials and rockets, along the way figuring out depending on government to celebrate political independence makes no sense.
• In the face of record cold snaps in southern states, climatologists debunk global warming, but are shocked to discover something much worse – Anthropomorphic Climate Reversal, where the equator freezes and the poles become sweltering tropics. Al Gore writes a new book.
• Director James Cameron announces a sequel to his hit film "Avatar," in which humans return with bigger guns and rout Jake and the Na'Vi, whose coalition had since dissolved back into tribalism. A third film, completing the trilogy, is also planned, in which the Pandorans, having been placed on reservations across the planet, open a series of Floating Mountain and Tree of Life casinos, soaking humanity for all its worth.Phil is editor for The Clarkston News. He is a veteran of the first Iraq war, having served in the U.S. Army.
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