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Jim's Jottings

Doggone dog not always mans best friend

April 07, 2010 - Seeing deer wander across my lot usually makes me smile. They wander often, not necessarily to get to the other side, but I think sometimes they want to see if they can entice ma'dog Shayna to cross her electric fence limits.

Six times they succeeded because I forget the batteries on her warning (shocking) system need changing.

On a recent eve, three deer wandered out of the brush. They drew Shayna's attention, and she promptly ran to the limit of her alarm, about 50 feet from the other four-leggeds.

Through time, both kinds of animal have learned their limits. Now they all stand there starring at each other for a while, then the deer go back to grazing and the dog goes for a drink of water.

However, down by the deer, my tulips have started to grow. Tulips to deer are like tequila to many drunks. They devour them quickly.

This evening I was bound and determined to save my tulips at all costs. Shayna never has learned "sic 'em," so I began walking toward the intruders, stocking-footed, shooshing and waving my arms.

The deer continued working their way toward my tulip bed. I started walking faster and waving harder.

Finally, I got the reaction I wanted. Each deer left the area in a different direction.

Satisfied with my victory, I returned across the lawn in the dusk, oblivious to the fact that this area is also Shayna's dumping ground, if you know what I mean.

Them socks are never to be worn again, but the smell and feel will be remembered, forever.

In the meantime, sitting on a backyard knoll, was that now-grinning man's best friend.

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• My clicker lingered too long going past "Desperate Housewives." After a few minutes I concluded the "desperation" on the part of the actresses is to see who can display the most leg and cleavage.

•On my package of Liquid Fence, bought to repel the deer from my tulips, was a $5 rebate coupon. I always fill out these rebate coupons. Under the line for my name was "Name (Hombre.)" In my youthful movie-going years, I saw mostly westerns when a white man was called "Hombre," I never related it to "name," in anything but slang. Hope I get my $5. How do they know I'm not a senora? Isn't protecting tulips women's work?

• TV commercial: "If you have more than $10,000 in credit card debt, etc." Well, don't call that number on your screen. Call a shrink, talk to God or look deeper into your mirror.

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From the animal news department: Pay heed to the remark, "Don't let them get our goat."

Because of the nations' rising ethnic population, the demand for chevon (goat meat) is in demand. It's especially popular on holy days.

The United States must import 750,000 goats yearly from places like Australia. Slaughtered goats are now bringing about $2 a pound. That's double what's being paid for cattle.

Then there's this. Out in Fair-minded, New mexiceo an patient limped into a hospital. It was dog.

When the automatic doors at San Juan Regional Medical Center's emergency room slid open one night the pooch walked in, blood on his nose and paw and a puncture hole in one leg.

Officials determined the German shepherd mix got into a row with another dog - and knew enough to go to the right place.

He was taken to the Farmington Animal Shelter, and claimed by his owner.

Jim Sherman, Sr. is president of Sherman Publications, Inc. He has penned "Jim's Jottings" since 1955.
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