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Jim's Jottings

Life's full of questions; What was I about to ask?

June 22, 2011 - I've always hated (disliked) articles filled with questions to the point I quit reading them. I figure I got questions, what I need are answers.

However, sometimes questions really need to be asked. Like, how come I can remember the Gettysburg Address, Lord's Prayer, some funny stories, etc., but can't find my glasses, can't remember grocery lists and golf strokes?

Then there's this current question: Do charities sell their donor lists?

A caller today from the breast cancer charity said, "I see you usually give $25."

How did they come up with that figure (which is right) unless it was supplied by someone I had previously donated to?

Are these donor lists sold to make more money? Is that really honest? Does it make it less likely I'll listen to the next spiel?

Yes. No. Yes.

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I was prescribed Paxil for depression. I've found that by cutting my evening news cast viewing in half, I achieve the same relaxed results.

• If we had our life to live over, we'd make some mistakes sooner. -- S. Cook

• When you don't succeed after you have tried again, you might read the instructions--if you can still find them.

• A chrysanthemum by any other name would be easier to spell.

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Professional sports, via tv or radio, have to have two people in the booth. They have to have "analysts."

It is assumed we viewers are incapable of understanding whatever we are watching. The air must be filled with words.

It is for people like me that our clickers have mute buttons. In baseball, a flyball is hit into the outfield (where else?) and the camera follows it. The colorer describes how far and how fast the fielder had to run to catch the ball. I know! I saw it!

We really don't need 47 replays of a football fumble or a golf swing. Silence can be good, too.

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• Considering the speed with which car makers are creating add-ons for cars, the self-driving sedan, mini-van and pickup could be here by 2015. They already have self-parkers.

• Which president stopped the Cape Canaveral space launchings?

• Nancy Pelosi is asking for an investigation into ethics in Congress. Let's start with a mirror.

• President Obama's current spokesman is Jay Carney. It's nice he's giving college kids a job. He really looks young.

• I'm no longer buying multi-packs of toilet paper. My way of shortening the inheritance list.

• Cooking advice for single men: Don't fry bacon wearing just your pajama bottoms.

• The downside of a lift chair: To get the most out of the chair you need the chair device, tv clicker, telephone and memory. Press the lift button and you can get a different channel or a dial tone, or any other combination thereof.

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An elementary school teacher in Florida took it upon herself to eliminate cursive writing for her students. Her bosses, the board of education, did the right thing in directing the teacher to stay with traditional writing, at least for now.

But, with the every-day introductions of electronic communicating devices, personal signatures may be on the endangered species list.

Jim Sherman, Sr. is president of Sherman Publications, Inc. He has penned "Jim's Jottings" since 1955.
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